As Yet Untitled
by Extraordinary77
Summary: Tom(Blink-182), Mark(Blink-182), Cyrus(New Found Glory), Luke, and Josie are stuck in detention where they are supposed to write four-page essays...but they have other plans...
1. Welcome to Detention

**Author's Note: Just a little fun story about some kids in high school acting like doofuses. There's Tom and Mark from Blink-182, some made up characters named Luke and Josie, and Cyrus from NFG (I've decided to dabble with cross-over! :D). Don't kill me if the guys aren't really like this in real life--I'm just bored and decided to have some fun with some of my favorite band members. Well, thanks for reading..enjoy! (and review!)**  
  
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"Hello, everyone," said the lady with the gray suit and condescending smile who stood at the front of the classroom. "And welcome to detention."  
  
"What the fuck does she think she is, some kind of dictator?" Luke leaned over and hissed to his friend, Tom. "Oh, I'm so scared!" Tom laughed and shook his head.  
  
The lady's attention shifted to the back of the room, where the two heathens sat. Her smile took a strange turn. "I see we have some critics in the audience. Tell me, what are your names?"  
  
"Oh, I'm Mark!" Tom piped up, giving her the name of his best friend.  
  
"I'm Josie," Luke put in, passing himself off with the name of Tom's girlfriend, also in the room. Mark, who sat on the other side of Luke, stepped on his Vans-clad foot. "Smooth move, dumbass!" Luke just rolled his eyes.  
  
The lady did the same.   
  
"The one with the purple hair is Tom DeLonge, Ms. Wattson," spoke up a girl with glasses and annoyingly curly hair who sat next to Ms. Wattson's desk. "And the blond one is Luke Charmell."  
  
Luke rolled his eyes again, and Tom threw up his hands in annoyance. Their friend Cyrus, who sat a few seats in front of them, turned back and shot them a sympathetic glance, along with a mouthed "bitch".  
  
"Thank you, Amanda," Ms. Wattson said. Amanda flashed a metallic smile. "Tom, Luke, you will stay an extra hour. Now, as I was getting ready to say, I'm Ms. Wattson, as you've probably deduced, and I will be your detention supervisor. For today, I'd like you to write me an essay describing the reason you're here--in detail. I'd also like you to include why you're sorry you did it, and why you will never do it again."  
  
"What if we're not sorry?" Luke muttered. Luckily for him, Ms. Wattson didn't hear his remark.  
  
"Now, I'm going to leave the room for a little while, and Miss Goodman here--" Ms. Wattson motioned towards Amanda. "--will be left in charge. I expect you all to work silently on your essays and give Miss Goodman no trouble." With that, Ms. Wattson turned briskly on her heel and left the room.  
  
"Hell, yeah, party time!" Mark exclaimed as soon as the door closed, his face adorned with a childish smile.  
  
"I don't think so," Amanda cut in. "You heard Ms. Wattson. You're supposed to work on your essays quietly."  
  
"Yes, Miss Goodman!" Tom chirped in a squeaky, high-pitched voice. Luke and Mark laughed and slapped him low-fives.  
  
"One more peep out of any of you and I am going to get Ms. Wattson!" Amanda exclaimed.  
  
There was a short silence.  
  
Luke couldn't contain himself... "Peep!"  
  
Amanda's face turned a fiery red. "That's it! I'm going to get Ms. Wattson!" And she stalked off out the door.  
  
For a moment, the room was silent. No one spoke a word...  
  
And then the laughter spilled out.  
  
"That's it, I'm going to get Ms. Wattson!" Mark mimicked in a shrill falsetto.  
  
"What a bitch," Cyrus commented.  
  
"Well, until she and the dragon lady come back, we may as well have a little fun," Josie said smiling.  
  
Tom gasped. "And the lady thinks we had to be told that!"  
  
Josie smiled as Tom leaned back to give her a quick kiss.  
  
"Enough sappy crappy, let's blow this place," Luke said.  
  
"Hey, a little fun is kick-ass cool, but we could get busted pretty easy if we tried to escape," Cyrus pointed out.  
  
"Yeah, and how would we get out anyway?" Mark inquired.  
  
Luke motioned toward the windows. "They're open, and they're big enough to crawl through. I know--I've done it."  
  
"Yeah, that's why you're in detention now," Josie said, rolling her eyes.  
  
"And you're the embodiment of innocence, Miss 'Let's Me and Tom Make Out in the Boys' Locker Room After Phys Ed'?" Luke challenged.  
  
"That wasn't the point, doofus."  
  
"You know, I guess we might as well. Even though they are obviously gonna find out once Amanda and Ms. Wattserface get back, we can always sneak out the next detention, and there are only a few weeks of school left, then we'll be free of San Dimas High School all together," Tom spoke up.  
  
"Hell, he's right--life is short, let's have some fun," Mark said.  
  
Luke smiled. "Anyone who doesn't wanna cut, raise your hand." He looked hard around his four friends. "All righty then!"  
  
Luke walked over to the window and slid it open easily.  
  
"Good thing we're on the first floor," Cyrus laughed.  
  
"Yeah, we'd have a hell of a time if we were up in Gavren's room," Josie smirked, thinking of their history teacher's top-floor classroom.  
  
"Okay, you guys, if I need a little push or something, I'll let you know. I'm gonna climb out now," Luke said.  
  
"Aw, will wittle Wuke need some help pushing his cute wi'l butt out the window?" Mark quipped.  
  
"Shut up, Hoppus." Luke playfully punched his friend, then put his hands on the bookshelf that was against the wall that had the windows and hoisted himself up and through the window.  
  
The rest of the gang didn't see him land, but they heard the small thump of Luke's shoes hitting the pavement and his slightly wind-stolen, "It's cool!"  
  
"Who's next?" Josie looked around the room.  
  
"I'll go ahead," Tom volunteered, jumping onto the bookshelf. A miniature porcelain statue of an apple sitting on top of a stack of books began to tremble.  
  
"Careful, Tom," Cyrus warned his friend, noticing the shaking paperweight.  
  
"Right-o!" Tom gave a mock salute just before he jumped out the window and onto the ground below. "Okay I'm good!"  
  
"I guess I'll follow," Josie said.  
  
Mark placed a hand on her shoulder. "You're a good man, Josie."  
  
Josie rolled her eyes and smilled as she climbed onto the bookshelf. She proceeded to jump out the window and signal her okay.  
  
Cyrus looked at Mark.   
  
"Okay, I guess I'll go ahead next," Mark said.  
  
"Cool...I wonder why that Amanda girl is taking so long," Cyrus pondered.  
  
"Whatever. Doesn't matter to me!" Mark exclaimed with a carefree smile as he jumped out the window.   
  
"Okay, I'm coming down now," Cyrus said to his friends.  
  
"I should hope so, Cyrus," Josie laughed.  
  
Cyrus was just placing his hands on the bookshelf's edge when he heard the doorknob turn. He froze on the spot.  
  
"Shit, Bolooki, come on!" Luke urged him impatiently.  
  
Then the door opened, causing Cyrus to jump and come back to his senses.  
  
"Oh, fuck..." He turned around to see who had entered the room. 


	2. A Zebra

A short Hispanic man in a blue uniform holding a mop and bucket stood in the doorway. Cyrus let out a long sigh of relief.  
  
The man motioned towards the room. "Clean?"  
  
"Is it clean?" Cyrus said, trying to figure out what he meant.  
  
"I clean?"  
  
"Oh, uh...yeah! Sure!" Cyrus started walking towards the janitor. "But I was just...getting...changed in here. And...so if you could wait one minute...un momento..." Cyrus held up a finger. "And then you can come in." Cyrus smiled as he slowly closed the door. "Just...just a minute! Thanks!"  
  
Once Cyrus had the door closed, he ran across the room, hoisted himself up onto the shelf and climbed quickly out the window, landing with a plop onto the ground outside.  
  
"Good save," Josie said with a sincere smile.  
  
"Oh yeah, Cyrus is Mr. Smooth," Luke snorted. "Why didn't you just tell him he couldn't clean the room?"  
  
"I don't know. I wasn't thinking right. But I got him out of there didn't I?" Cyrus defended himself. "Anyway, the point is we're all out here, the janitor's in the hall, but he could come back in any second."  
  
They all looked at each other.  
  
Mark spoke up. "Then let's bolt!"  
  
***  
Cyrus, Josie, Luke, Mark, and Tom stopped breathlessly as soon as they were out of the view of the school.  
  
"So," Luke puffed. "Where should we go from here?"  
  
"I propose we hit the a couple blocks down," Tom suggested. He wiggled his eyebrows.  
  
"Sounds good," approved Josie, her hand in Tom's.  
  
"Lllllet's go then!" Mark grinned.  
  
Cyrus and Luke nodded and smiled. "Right on."  
  
***  
When the group of seniors got to the mall, they immediately came to an indecision as to which stores to visit.  
  
"We should go to Victoria's Secret!" Tom said smiling.  
  
Mark laughed. "Oh, hell, yeah, man, right on!"  
  
Cyrus laughed and held up his hands. "Oh, no ya don't. I'm not going in there."  
  
"Ah, why not?" Josie gently nudged him. "We can go somewhere else afterward."  
  
"But..."  
  
Luke rolled his eyes for the umpteenth time that day. "Okay, if Bolooki doesn't want to go we'll just go without him."  
  
"You're a fucking asshole, you know, that, Luke?" Cyrus rolled his eyes but couldn't help smiling. "All right, let's go."  
  
So they walked up to the second floor to the lingerie shop. As soon as they walked in, Tom's eyes lit up. "This is heaven."  
  
"No, dude," Mark said. "It isn't anything until we see the models."  
  
Tom put an arm around Josie. "I have my own personal model right here." She laughed and playfully swatted him.  
  
Very feminine shoppers stared at the group of teenagers as they walked down the aisles looking at the lingerie, Mark fingering the laciest of ones.  
  
He was just holding a silk, rose-patterned bra-and-panties set up to himself when a chubby, manicured finger lightly tapped his shoulder.   
  
Mark turned around and saw a short, somewhat stocky old woman with a twisted updo and a brown pantsuit eyeing the group.  
  
"May I help you?" she said coldly.  
  
Luke leaned over to Tom. "You'd think they would have some sexier broads working here," he whispered.   
  
Tom shifted the attention from Luke's remark and said, "Yes, do you have any zebras?"  
  
The lady pursed her lips and raised her eyebrows. "Well, sir, we have an animal print section in the back--"  
  
"That's not what I meant, ma'am," Tom said politely.  
  
"What did you mean then?" The saleslady's patience seemed to be wearing down.  
  
"A zebra," Tom responded with a perfectly straight face. "You know, a bra in the largest size..."  
  
The lady's face was blank for a moment, then turned red as her fingernails as slow realization dawned on her. "Why...I can't believe...out!" she sputtered. "I want you out of this store, and if I see any of you in here again, I will call security."  
  
The fivesome walked hurriedly, silently out of the store, and once they were a good distance away they burst out laughing.   
  
"Somebody's a little slow!" Luke chuckled.   
  
"Hey, I don't see what's funny," Tom said. "Now we can't go into Victoria's Secret anymore."  
  
Mark patted him on the shoulder. "Cheer up, my friend. There are other malls."  
  
"Well, now that we've been thrown out of there, where do you want to go?" Josie asked.  
  
"I don't know about you guys but I'm starved. I had to skip lunch today to cram for the chem quiz..." Cyrus began.  
  
"You know what that means, kiddies!" Mark took on a superhero-ly pose as he thrust an arm in front of himself. "Off to the food court!" 


	3. In Line for a Smoothie

Once all five of the teens got to the food court, of course, they couldn't decide where to eat.  
  
"Let's go Japanese!" Mark suggested.  
  
"Ooh, yeah," Cyrus smiled. "Sushi…"  
  
"Yuck. I'm thinking Burger King," Luke said.  
  
"I know not about all uff yew, but I am in ze mood for some pizza!" Tom drawled.  
  
"Pizza's Italian, not French, Einstein," Luke informed Tom with a signature roll of his eyes.  
  
"Yeah, but French is the only accent I can do really well."  
  
"Well, pizza sounds fine with me," Josie put in.  
  
"Okay, well, then I guess Josie and Tom can go get their French pizza," Cyrus laughed. "Luke can get his Burger King, and Mark and I will go and claim our sushi."  
  
"Mmm…teriyaki sauce." A foamy line of drool descended from Mark's pierced lip.  
  
"Euw! Mark, that's gross!" Josie exclaimed. But she was laughing.  
  
"Come now, mademoiselle," Tom said, hooking his arm around Josie's. "I shall take you a-way from zees nonsense and to some pizza zat is tres magnifique." Tom kissed and flared his fingers before heading off to the pizza stand.  
  
"Kay, well I'm gonna go get myself a few Whoppers." Luke patted his stomach and walked off toward the Burger King section.  
  
Cyrus and Mark looked at each other and smiled. "Sushi time!"  
  
***  
Cyrus, Josie, Luke, Mark, and Tom met back after a few minutes at a table Josie and Tom had staked out, being the first back.  
  
Luke set down his tray and unwrapped his first of three Whoppers.  
  
"Eating light today, Luke?" Tom teased.  
  
Luke's response was muffled by the first huge bite of hamburger he had stuffed into his mouth.  
  
"Mmm!" Cyrus exclaimed after eating some sushi, his eyes closed in pleasure. "Teriyaki heaven!"  
  
"A fine choice, my brother, a fine choice," Mark commended his friend.  
  
"Vell, I still say ze pizza ees ze gourmet food of choice," Tom said with a superior air, his chin in the air and his cheek streaked with tomato sauce.  
  
"Hey…" Josie suddenly said, squinting her eyes at someone standing in line for a smoothie. "Doesn't that guy over there in the line at Surfin' Sam's look familiar?"  
  
The others turned their heads.  
  
"Yeah…" Cyrus said. "He looks like…"  
  
Everybody looked at each other. "Mr. Gavren!"   
  
The man turned and looked at the table of seniors. Then the white-haired, hunter green cardigan-wearing man began to walk towards them.  
  
"Oh, shit," Luke hissed. "He's coming over here. Why is he coming over here?"  
  
"Well, we did just exclaim his name in unison," Josie pointed out. "That would capture my attention."  
  
"What are we going to do?" Cyrus asked frantically. "Should we run?"  
  
"I vote we duck our heads down into our shirts and hope he doesn't see who we are," Tom proposed.  
  
"I think he saw us already," Josie said. "And, anyway, I'm wearing a tank top."  
  
Before anyone else could say anything, the social studies teacher was standing at their table.  
  
"Hello there," he said.  
  
"We're sorry, Mr. Gavren. We didn't mean to cause much trouble--" Cyrus started.  
  
Tom cut in. "But the teacher left the room in detention, and--"   
  
"Detention?" Mr. Gavren asked. "You were supposed to be in detention?"  
  
Everyone grew silent. No one moved for a moment.  
  
Then Tom pounded his head onto the table.  
  
"No…" Luke said after a while. "They were just joking. DeLonge, Bolooki, you losers." He uttered a laugh.  
  
"It's no use," Josie said to Luke.  
  
"What are you kids talking about?" Mr. Gavren was visibly confused. "Now here I was standing in line for a drink and I hear you kids call my name, so I come over to say hello. But what's this about detention?..." Realization slowly dawned on him. "You kids snuck out of detention, didn't you?"  
  
Mark sighed. "I guess there's no use denying it."  
  
Cyrus mouthed a "sorry" to his friends.   
  
"Well, I'm sorry to say, but I'm sure you've already figured out that you're not going to get away with this," Mr. Gaven said sympathetically. A faraway look came into his eyes. "I remember doing stuff like this when I was a kid all the time."  
  
"Really?" Cyrus asked.  
  
"Yep..." Mr. Gavren took a seat at their table. "I'd get in trouble for drawing impolite pictures of the teachers--" Mark blushed, remembering the crude portrait of his physics teacher (nose dripping, farting, and all) that had scored him his detention. "--and when I got detentions, my friends and I would do things like put tacks on the teacher's chair, and while she was running to the powder room, we'd split." He rubbed his hands together and laughed. "Now don't get any ideas, though."  
  
Josie laughed. "We won't."  
  
"Of course, eventually, all the detentions got to our heads...we were so full of the idea of being these big macho bad guys who were so funny that we started to neglect our schoolwork among other things. We didn't take anything seriously..." Luke performed his famous eyeroll. "I see Mr. Charmell fits into this category quite well." The other laughed while Luke just blushed. Mr. Gavren patted him on the back. "Anyway, well, I ended up having to repeat senior year."  
  
"That sucks!" Mark blurted.  
  
Mr. Gavren laughed, his white mustache jumping. "Yeah, well...I learned my lesson. That year I threw myself into my studies. And I graduated with honors." He looked around the table at the staring teenagers. "And...that's my story for today."  
  
There was a short silence.  
  
Josie smiled. "Well...that's really cool, Mr. Gavren."  
  
"It was just supposed to be some end of the year fun..." Luke explained toughly.  
  
"Sometimes that's just enough," Mr. Gavren replied.  
  
"Well, it's kinda too late now," Luke replied.  
  
"But we've learned our lesson," Cyrus put in quickly. Tom nodded.  
  
"You're not going to, um, tell anyone are you, Mr. Gavren?" Mark flashed his third-period teacher his pearly whites and batted his eyelashes.  
  
Mr. Gavren smiled. "No, I'm not. But you don't think that whoever was presiding over detention _won't know_ that you cut? Certainly if he or she came back to the room after a brief break and found it empty, he would figure it out... Unless he really wasn't bright... who was this?"  
  
"Mrs...what was it, Holmes?" Tom looked at his friends.  
  
"Wattson, that was it," Josie confirmed.  
  
"Holmes," Luke scoffed as he...well, you know.  
  
"Well, I see where the association rooted from," Mr. Gavren grinned. "Anyway, Ms. Wattson is a tough one."  
  
"Don't we know it," Luke said. The others nodded.  
  
"What I would advise you all to do is to go back to school and somehow apologize to Ms. Wattson." Groans ensued. "I know, I know. But I think it's the best way to minimize your punishment. If at all."  
  
"So you're saying it's, like, the least we can do?" Cyrus inquired.  
  
Mr. Gavren answered, "Exactly."  
  



End file.
